So I’m sitting and staring out the window. I’d really like to change up my life and be a little more organized; a little more productive; a little more purposeful. Notice the “little more”. Like I’m not looking to set any records. It’s good to start slowly at the age of 73 and proceed gradually. Most days this is as far as I get and then I let my day ramble along, accomplishing a haphazard assortment of unnecessary tasks.
But now that the truth of being in my later years, creeps into my daily thoughts, perhaps I need to focus. What if I have only a few years left? A few months? A few days? I hope I get through typing this!
So, the first thing I turn to is getting my family ready. We have the big stuff done like a trust and will, plans for our death (cremation – no services – kids get together and tell funny stories from our family life). Pretty good so far. I have a code book for accessing necessary accounts, which two of my kids have seen and are convinced no one will be able to decipher my cross outs and rewrites. Hey I tried!
Now I’ve moved on to talk about my upcoming death, my feelings, what I want the kids to remember, how much I love my beloved Wayne, you know the sort of stuff. I don’t want to leave anything unsaid; I want to comfort my sons and daughter; I want my husband to know how tricky the budget really is.
Guess what? No one wants to talk to me about this stuff. My husband says the checkbook gives him canker sores. My sons humor me somewhat but quickly change the subject. My daughter dissolves into a puddle of tears and says she will lose it when I die. I explain she will have to keep it together for her children and grandchild. She stubbornly refuses.
So what’s a person to do?
Psalm 116:15 – “Precious in the sight of the Lord is the death of His saints.”
Psalm 46:10 – Be still and know that I am God…”
Yep. That will work!