For those of you who checked in today to read a little devotional thought – thanks so much but I need to have a little conversation with myself.
What?
Oh of course you are welcome to listen but … well this isn’t going to be pretty.
***
“Okay look I know today hasn’t been great. But you know these things happen and the bottom line is you need to forgive.”
You don’t understand … this really hurt! And its not the first time and let’s be real it won’t be the last time. I’m sick of it. And what does that mean anyway to forgive? I’m just not sure what that means. (pouty face)
“Well you seem to know what it means when you ask God to forgive you when you’ve done something wrong. So I’m pretty sure you do know what it means.”
Yes well … I ask!!! They didn’t ask me to forgive them. Of course if they did I would. But they didn’t. So I’m just going to … I’m going to … (angry face)
“Exactly. Where are you going with this? You’re going to … not forgive?? Or maybe you think there are other options?”
I’ll forgive when asked! (self-righteous face)
“You’ve been asked.”
No that isn’t true – they never ask for forgiveness. And the things are done in such a way that I can’t even … oh I can’t even confront it. It’s like a passive-aggressive -(I have been wronged face)
“Stop.”
What do you mean stop? I want to explain my side. You don’t understand!!!” (misunderstood face)
“First of all – I understand. Have you forgotten you are talking to yourself? It isn’t necessary to tell your side. God already knows it. And God is the one who asked you to forgive.”
Well then I want to talk to God. (hopeful face)
Mark 11:25 “And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive him, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins.”
Oh. (convicted face)